Am I Being Gaslit? Recognize the Signs and Reclaim Your Reality

“Am I Overreacting… or Is Something Really Wrong?”

If you’ve found yourself questioning your memory, doubting your feelings, or wondering who you even are anymore, you are not alone.

Many people experiencing gaslighting don’t initially recognize it as abuse. Instead, it often feels like confusion, self-doubt, or a quiet sense that something just isn’t right.

As described on my site, gaslighting can leave you:

• Questioning your emotional reactions

• Doubting your memory

• Feeling like everything is somehow your fault 

And here’s the most important part:
It’s not your fault.

What Gaslighting Actually Is

Gaslighting is a form of emotional and psychological abuse designed to make you question your reality. 

Over time, it creates a destabilizing effect where you begin to rely on the other person’s version of events instead of trusting yourself.

It doesn’t always look obvious. In fact, it’s often subtle, gradual, and confusing—especially in close relationships.

Common Signs You May Be Experiencing Gaslighting

Gaslighting often happens through patterns—not one isolated event. You may notice dynamics like:

• Your partner’s words and actions don’t match

• You’re told you’re “too sensitive” or “dramatic” when you express feelings

• You’re frequently told you’re remembering things incorrectly

• Your feelings are dismissed, minimized, or mocked

• You’re blamed for things that don’t feel like yours to carry

• Your needs are framed as selfish

• Your successes are minimized or criticized

• You’re told what you feel isn’t real or valid 

Over time, these experiences can begin to erode your confidence in your own mind.

How Gaslighting Makes You Feel

One of the most painful parts of gaslighting is not just what happens—but how it changes your internal world.

You may begin to experience:

1. Constant Self-Doubt

You second-guess your thoughts, memories, and decisions—even small ones.

2. Guilt for Having Needs

You feel selfish or wrong for wanting basic emotional care or boundaries.

3. Emotional Exhaustion

You’re constantly scanning, adjusting, or trying to “get it right” to avoid conflict.

4. Isolation

You may pull away from others—or feel like no one would understand.

5. Loss of Identity

You start to wonder: Who am I, really? Your voice feels smaller. Your certainty fades. 

Why Gaslighting Is So Confusing

Gaslighting works because it’s inconsistent.

There may be moments of kindness, connection, or apology that make you question your experience:

• “Maybe I’m being too sensitive.”

• “They didn’t mean it like that.”

• “It’s not always bad…”

This push-pull dynamic can keep you stuck in a cycle of doubt and hope.

And especially for highly sensitive, empathetic people—you may be more likely to:

• Look for the good

• Take responsibility for the relationship

• Try harder instead of stepping back

The Truth: You Are Not “Too Sensitive”

If you’re asking yourself, “Am I being gaslit?”—that question alone matters.

Gaslighting often leads people to believe:

• They are the problem

• They are overreacting

• They need to change to make things better

But your sensitivity is not the problem.
‍ It’s often the part of you that knows something isn’t right.

How Healing Begins

Healing from gaslighting is not about proving what happened.
It’s about reclaiming your relationship with yourself.

Trauma-informed therapy can help you:

• Rebuild trust in your own thoughts and feelings

• Understand how gaslighting impacted your nervous system

• Release guilt and self-blame

• Learn to set boundaries without fear or shame

• Reconnect with your sense of identity and inner voice

Healing is often slow, gentle, and deeply validating.

A Gentle Invitation

If this resonates, you are not alone—and you don’t have to figure it out by yourself.

Gaslighting can make you feel like you’re losing your footing. Therapy can help you find it again.

You are allowed to trust yourself.
You are allowed to take your feelings seriously.

If you’re ready to begin that process, I invite you to connect with me.

Christina Sheehan, LPC, LMHC
Inner Life Psychotherapy — Radical, Transformative Counseling for Highly Sensitive Women
Telehealth in Oregon & Washington
503-470-3128 │ www.innerlifetherapy.com