She knew this transition was not about becoming someone better, but about finally allowing herself to become who she’d always been.
Major Life Change
It might be graduating from high school or college, a mid-life or quarter-life crisis, divorce, losing a loved one, a medical diagnosis, or getting married, a promotion, changing careers, being fired or just knowing you need to change your life. Change can feel incredibly hard. But it doesn't need to stay that way any longer then necessary.
When we are being asked to grow in new directions it can quickly get scary and confusing. You might feel anxious, depressed, irritable, frustrated, like everything is in your way and no one understands. When life changes whether by choice or circumstance, we lose our old ways of being before we know what the new way looks like. Yikes.
Major life transitions don't have to begin and end with suffering. Transitions give you the opportunity to assess what is working and what is not working, to get in touch with who you are and who you want to be. To consciously decide what you would like your life to look like and design your future. There is much potential when a major transition shakes up your world, but it can be difficult to harness this power when you are in the midst of pain. The trick is not to get stuck in the transition, but to move through it and be able to use it to launch your next chapter.
Signs & Symptoms of a Stuck Transition
Time: its been more then 3 months since the life event and you feel like it just happened, or have completely ignored the life change and are pretending everything is ok.
Feeling Gray: nothing seems exciting anymore. Everyday looks and feels the same, there is nothing to look forward too, and you feel blocked, stifled, constricted, numb.
Emotional Leaking: Tears, anger, irritability, a moodiness that seems out of place or out of proportion to the situation.
Feeling Stuck: you know that life doesn't feel that great, and you know things could be different, but you don't know how or what to change.
Change in Eating: eating more sugar than usual, skipping meals, changes in your typical diet can help you gain insight to your inner state. Obsessing over a new diet or eating plan can often be a way we try to contain the pain and fear of uncertainty.
Yearning for More: that small inner knowing or the voice that whispers for more. More aliveness, more meaning, more purpose, more me.
Therapy for Life Transitions
In therapy we will begin by focusing on grieving what is past, building resiliency skills, exploring personal patterns and behaviors. Once you start feeling a little better we start to dig deeper, working on identifying what may be holding you back from creating the future you desire. We will focus on your feelings, thoughts and goals as well as exploring values, purpose and passions.
It's common to lose confidence, to feel not good enough, to want to hide from change. When we ignore the possibilities inherent in change we become stuck. Feeling stuck can happen when change is ignored or unconsciously fought against. When we can't tolerate change we remain in survival mode, not really living, just stagnating. Working with a therapist during transition periods supports your deepest well being, identifies and embraces emerging strengths, and helps to reignite your aliveness, vitality and joy.
Transition therapy can keep you from getting stuck.
You don't have to survive a life change alone, you can surpass a painful transition with someone who can help keep you pointed in the direction of your best life.
Professional Counseling in Lake Oswego, SW Portland, Beaverton, Tigard & Greater Portland